Finding Balance: A New Perspective on the New Year

For much of my life, a new year meant resolutions. Like many, I saw January as a time for change—often focused on diet plans, self-improvement goals, and the pressure to “do better.” But as I step into 2025, things feel different. In December, I turned 40. And in the same month, I received a life-changing diagnosis: I am autistic.

This diagnosis wasn’t a shock, but rather a confirmation of something I had long sensed about myself. It brought clarity—an understanding of why I experience the world the way I do, why I need structure and routine, why certain social situations drain me, and why I’ve always been drawn to deep, meaningful conversations. It also made me reflect on my journey to becoming a counsellor, a path that has brought me far more fulfilment than any January resolution ever could. Looking back, it also explains why resolutions never really worked for me. The pressure to force change in a way that didn’t align with how I naturally function only led to frustration. What I needed wasn’t a “new me” each January but a deeper understanding and acceptance of me as I am.

For years, I chased external goals, measuring success by achievements and productivity. But experience—and many hours of self-reflection—have taught me that real growth isn’t about ticking boxes. It’s about balance. And balance doesn’t mean getting it “right” all the time. Sometimes, the scales tip the other way, and that’s okay. Life ebbs and flows, and learning to accept that is part of the process.

This year, rather than setting rigid resolutions, I’m focusing on what truly sustains me: self-care. For me, that means taking time to read at weekends without guilt, being strict about switching off from work at the end of the day, and allowing myself to rest. It also means showing up fully when I am working, giving my clients the best of me, knowing that I have also given the best to myself.

We are all different. What balance looks like for me may not be the same for you. And that’s the beauty of it—there is no one-size-fits-all approach to self-care, growth, or happiness. So this January, instead of focusing on fixing or changing, I’m choosing to honour who I am. And maybe that’s the most powerful resolution of all.